Monday, October 23, 2006

Things which perplex...

For the past week or so, I've been attempting to mentally compile a list of things that irritate me and / or I just don't understand. Here we go...

People who insist on pressing the elevator button after it already been pushed
While at work last week, I decided that this tiny act drives me nuts. Three people are waiting on the 1st floor to go up. A woman comes over and re-presses the already-lit up button. Seriously, woman, do you think it's going to come faster just because you pressed it?

Complete strangers who ask you for a cigarette
When I pull out a pack of gum in any public area, no one asks me for a piece. I figured out that this may not be socially acceptable. However, if you're smoking, and some yahoo wants a cigarette, they figure they can ask you. Maybe I should have more sympathy for other casual smokers (or smokers in general) but they should buy their own damn pack. I don't know them. It's not even as if we were technically breathing the same air in a bar, yet random people can come up to me and ask me for a cigarette? Yet, you can pull out a pack of gum and no one asks for a piece, even though chewing gum is much more socially acceptable than smoking. I don't get it.

The intense media fascination with Lindsay Lohan
Sure, Mean Girls was a good movie, but I don't see why every time this girl is photographed not properly holding her legs together while getting into the back of an Escalade should make the news. How does this affect my life except to point out the obvious fact that normal people are never hospitalized for exhaustion, nor can they call into work and cite "exhaustion" as the reason they won't be in.

Why the taxes & fees on an overseas flight nearly equal the ticket price
I'm sure I could look up the reasons why, but I'll do it later. Orbitz has no right to tell me a round-trip ticket from Boston to Heathrow is $228 in boldface when the taxes & fees total $225. The last time I flew, my Lancome Juicy Tube was confiscated. I don't even know if I can bring carry-on my iPod or even a book on this flight in January, but I can be charged $225 in fees.

Bachelorette Parties
Now the source of extra cash, I am gaining even more insight into these spectacles. I don't want to hear about how you're too good, or too embarrassed to dance on a pole, when you willingly attended the damn party. Especially when your breasts are clearly popping out of your bar clothes. My breasts are firmly held in place and I'm wearing less than you. So shove it. You know you're going to be all over the first loser who buys you a Coors Light. And don't start "whoo-hooing" because the Pussycat Dolls' Buttons is playing. (The Pussycat Dolls...The one musical act which makes the Black-Eyed Peas almost decent.)

Inanimate objects with MySpace profiles
Seriously, am I really going to want to add a Gilette razor or pink iPod Nano to my MySpace friends? I know this stupid site is an advertising & financial goldmine, but giving profiles to material and or personal goods? That's just a jackass move.

2 comments:

Chiltblogg said...

Hey good lookin,

I have quit posting to my blog because I have fired 2 people in the last couple of months that had some crazy shit on their blog, and I just cant risk it. Love you postings. I never surf at work anymore and I just don't get to see your stuff that much.

Fuck ramdoms who ask for smokes. If its a girl she at least need to rub her tits casually on your arm. Especially if you give her a light as well.

Here's to another Democratic defeat in '06.

Rove promised to set Kerry up with a woman even richer and uglier than Heinz for 10 mil...

My V8 powered 15 mpg Jaguar loves Iraqi Oil!!!!!!!

Chilton

Chiltblogg said...

One of the greates disasters of all time is the degradation of Lindsay Lohan's breasts. If you want a good idea for a costume party. Show up looking really hot and saucy. 30 minutes later go in the bathroom, fuck up your hair and makeup, minimize your cleavage and come out looking like shit. 30 minutes later go back in and do yourself up sexy-like. Repeat. Personally, she has fallen into total hollywood skank range, along with Jessica Simpson (her sister is hotter now afer the platic surgery). And because you know half the Jackass crew tapped that ass in New Orleans.